A New Desk
So for the last four years, I've worked at Samaritan Ministries International, dreaming of the day that I wouldn't have to do it anymore so I could be in ministry full time.
But something happened about a year in. They gave me a chance in Communications, and I realized I had a knack. For writing, editing, layout, things like that.
So I've done it the last three years, and it's been a blast. I liked it so much, there were times that different people questioned if I'd lost my drive for full-time ministry because of it. I never thought I had, and in fact, I'm sure that the skills I've developed at SMI, and the opportunities I've been given, have made me a better pastor.
So when I told my boss, Ray King, that I would be leaving as soon as I found a church, it was with excitement and anticipation. I was going to take everything I'd learned and use it doing what I knew I was supposed to do with my life. I'll be out of here in a month or so, I told Ray. And I believed it.
But God had other plans. That church hasn't opened up yet. And my replacement had been brought into the department and shown the ropes. So last week, Ray told me that they'd be asking me to help out in another department where I was needed. The department where I had started, actually.
Now, everyone at SMI has been awesome about this. Let's make that very clear.
But that doesn't keep it from feeling really weird.
Yesterday, I moved my stuff out of my Communications desk, and moved it into my Member Services desk. This move wasn't supposed to happen. At first, I felt really out of sorts, with this weird vibe in the pit of my stomach. Telling people to refer their questions to Aaron/Jed, made sure the feeling wouldn't go away.
Kristy says this'll give me more motivation, keep me restless. I suppose so: but I'd have to add another emotion to those. I can't think of one word for it, but it feels something like: Is this it? Did I make a mistake? What's going on? Why am I here? Why am I still here? Let me think - yes, I knew that was God's will, and that was God's will, but maybe...
I'll be fine. But right now, I feel all funky inside.
What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.
In God I will praise his word, in God I have put my trust; I will not fear what flesh can do unto me.
- The Bible, Psalm 56:3,4
But something happened about a year in. They gave me a chance in Communications, and I realized I had a knack. For writing, editing, layout, things like that.
So I've done it the last three years, and it's been a blast. I liked it so much, there were times that different people questioned if I'd lost my drive for full-time ministry because of it. I never thought I had, and in fact, I'm sure that the skills I've developed at SMI, and the opportunities I've been given, have made me a better pastor.
So when I told my boss, Ray King, that I would be leaving as soon as I found a church, it was with excitement and anticipation. I was going to take everything I'd learned and use it doing what I knew I was supposed to do with my life. I'll be out of here in a month or so, I told Ray. And I believed it.
But God had other plans. That church hasn't opened up yet. And my replacement had been brought into the department and shown the ropes. So last week, Ray told me that they'd be asking me to help out in another department where I was needed. The department where I had started, actually.
Now, everyone at SMI has been awesome about this. Let's make that very clear.
But that doesn't keep it from feeling really weird.
Yesterday, I moved my stuff out of my Communications desk, and moved it into my Member Services desk. This move wasn't supposed to happen. At first, I felt really out of sorts, with this weird vibe in the pit of my stomach. Telling people to refer their questions to Aaron/Jed, made sure the feeling wouldn't go away.
Kristy says this'll give me more motivation, keep me restless. I suppose so: but I'd have to add another emotion to those. I can't think of one word for it, but it feels something like: Is this it? Did I make a mistake? What's going on? Why am I here? Why am I still here? Let me think - yes, I knew that was God's will, and that was God's will, but maybe...
I'll be fine. But right now, I feel all funky inside.
What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.
In God I will praise his word, in God I have put my trust; I will not fear what flesh can do unto me.
- The Bible, Psalm 56:3,4
posted by pastor mike at 2:51 PM
3 Comments:
we're glad, though, for a little while to still have you here and to be able to extend work to you while you're waiting for God to open up that next stage in your life.
May He use even this new and old work to continue to form you into His man who will shepherd His flock.
On His Blindness
John Milton
When I consider how my light is spent
Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,
And that one Talent which is death to hide
Lodged with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest He returning chide,
"Doth God exact day-labour, light denied?"
I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent
That murmur, soon replies, "God doth not need
Either man's work or his own gifts. Who best
Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state
Is kingly: thousands at his bidding speed,
And post o'er land and ocean without rest;
They also serve who only stand and wait."
Hey dude, You know I'm prayin for ya... just remember in God's timing (not our own) He will give us what we need. Oh, and to repeat the what you told me a million times growning up... Just wait. "Em, just wait on God" So... "Mike, just wait on God..." ;) love ya dude - Em
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