TTFN

This will be the last post at this location. I have taken up residence at this spot, and I sincerely hope you'll join me there.

On Value Systems, Part 1: or, I was expecting my abyss experience to come with a sucking sound

When someone becomes a follower of Jesus Christ, their internal system of values begins to morph into a value system reflecting the values of Jesus. As a person becomes more aware of the life-encompassing message of God, as given to us in the Bible and through the work of God's Holy Spirit, the follower of Jesus often alters various aspects of his lifestyle so that they reflect this changing inner value system.

Often, they will make choices about such things as clothing, music, social life, etc. (among a myriad of possible areas) so that their lifestyle will reflect the values of God.

In my circle of churches, these choices are known as standards. They are given a great deal of weight, and are often viewed as a rough indicator of a person's depth of spirituality/commitment to Christ/etc.

I bring this up because I've had several conversations recently on the general subject of these choices, with people my age and from my circle of churches. These conversations have prompted some thoughts about lifestyle decisions in the journey of followers of Christ.

My general observation from these conversations is that many of the factors involved in the decision-making process are headed in wrong directions. A composite might include the following scenario:

Lifestyle decisions are not taught in the context of relationship: they’re preached from a pulpit. So, when the time comes for a person to deal with the issue, there’s no indication that the matter is up for further explanation, or explanation in the context of an individual’s life, or anything like that. Just do it, already.

Lifestyle decisions are made for members by their leadership. For some, this is their pastor; for others, it starts with their parents and continues with their pastor.

These decisions are made, in general, with what is at best the flimsiest of explanations. This is not unexpected, given that these decisions are generally expressed as five-to-ten minute components of fourty-five minute sermons that are generally on another topic.

So the above circumstances result in this virtual vacuum in which a person is left to come to their own decision. Void of a relationship in which to work out the details of the decision, and with the aforementioned flimsy explanations in hand, the person is often left to interpret someone else's explanations on their own. In this vacuum, when someone else's interpretation of a Biblical principle doesn't make sense to them, it can be simply discarded as a disagreement that has no bearing on their own process.

Often, the result of these environmental factors is that a person's own lifestyle decision will be, to varying degrees, different from the decision made for them by parents or church leadership. In those cases, more often than not, the reaction on the part of leadership often is disappointment in them. Many times this disappointment, though palpable, is not actually articulated; rather, it remains just under the surface, and becomes part of the lens through which leadership views the person. Sometimes it manifests itself in subsequent sermons, or in conversations with others. All of this happens without any substantive interaction with the actual individual. At all.

And then the person, having made this decision that goes against precedent, discovers that the floor doesn't drop out from under them and they don't get sucked into the abyss and...they don't even feel bad about it. And because the whole process has happened in this vacuum, they assume that it never was wrong, and that there are entire segments of their lives that they want back, and now they wonder what other stuff they could be doing without getting sucked into the abyss...

I have not mentioned particular decisions at all in this piece. I won't: that's not the point. The point is, the above composite description is a bad, unhealthy way to come to any decision. But it is a frighteningly common one. And, in my view, it's producing confused, irritated, grass-is-greener-on-the-other-side followers of Christ.

In a future post, I'll share my thoughts on how this process could be more reflective of the way of Christ. In the meantime, I'd like to hear if you identify with any part of this story.

Undone

I have come face to face with how messed up people can be, and I'm freaking out.

I have read an anonymous first-person account of abuse. Sustained abuse. Matter-of-fact descriptions that made me want to throw up.

I'm scared. Of what people are capable of - what I'm capable of - when God's values aren't in place.

I'm scared of what we might become when we're not moving toward holiness.

I'm scared of what life's been like for this person. Of the horror, the burden, the gnawing...

I'm scared that healing can't take place because no one knows anything's broken.

I'm scared that I will be the pastor of a church where people could come and go and I might never even have a clue of what someone might need, because I did not create environments condusive to finding out, to asking people hard questions with enough love that they understood they could be honest and start to confront the hard answers.

I'm scared that I might get so caught up in something else, I wouldn't see these people coming. Or that I wouldn't have any real desire for them to come.

Would someone remind me again how we got to this place? And what we have to do to set a different trajectory for life in Christ?

'Cause right now, I'm scared out of my mind.

Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.
- The Bible, Matthew 23:23

twenty minutes ago i would have been...oh, never mind

So here's a question...

You're set to attend the first morning worship service at the church who, by a 100% vote, extended to you the call to be their pastor. You've accepted their invitation, and the current pastor has asked you to come be part of the church's Thanksgiving gathering, then officially accept their call when you preach for them in the service.

Which of the following would leave the best impression on the people you're going to pastor?

A) Show up at 9:30 am for the 10:00 am gathering
B) Show up at 10:00 am for the 10:00 am gathering
C) Show up at 10:20 am for what you inexplicably knew was a 10:30 am gathering, but was in fact a 10:00 am gathering

If you guessed A or B, you'd be predictable, boring, and...correct. If you guessed C, you're not predictable and boring, but you're not correct, either. If you guessed A but did C, well, that'd make you me.

Fortunately, the people were very gracious, and the Lord used the sermon to speak to hearts. (Three different people mentioned afterwards that I seemed less nervous than the last time I'd preached. Which was certainly true, but I was also numb from the embarrassment, which...helped, I think.)

We ate lunch with the people at the church, and I got the chance to interact with more of the people. We were also the partial recipients of a sparkling apple cider toast, which was memorable also because Gracie kept taking the plastic wine-glass-looking thingy and swinging it around, re-enacting the "Scamps, scamps, a toast to this night" scene from Sleeping Beauty.

The outlook is rosy, indeed.

Live and On Location

For this post, I am reporting to you live from the lobby of the Holiday Inn on the east side of Indianapolis.

Our new church, Oaklandon Baptist, graciously invited us to come over for this weekend, to join with them for their Thanksgiving gathering on Saturday evening, and for worship on Sunday morning.

There were about 40 in attendance, a pleasant-surprisingly large number. Kristy and I got the chance to meet many of the extended family and friends of church members. Red came in late: he and his friend came straight to the church from Notre Dame's blowout win over Navy, which had Red in good spirits.

Before the dinner, we got to spend a little time at the home of the current pastor, Bro. Smith, and his wife. Kristy enjoyed chatting as Mrs. Smith prepared mashed potatoes, and I kept Derek from breaking stuff as Bro. Smith and I talked.

I'm struck by the diversity of people in the area where God has called us. In my short time here, I've come across people from more different places in life than I could have expected. I pray that God allows us to be intentional about showing people from all these different life places what life together in the way of Christ can look like.

Kristy, as usual, has been amazing through today: the four-hour trip, feeding lunch to three kids in the car on the way, getting everyone ready for the dinner, interacting with the children and the ladies, all while being eight months along - and all with the grace and inner beauty of a soulmate who knows she is doing exactly what she was made to do. It's a thing of divine beauty, to be sure.

We're pretty stoked to be part of what God's doing in this stage of our lives.

Where exactly does my money go?

As of 3:00 PM Sunday, Nov. 6, I am the next pastor of the Oaklandon Baptist Church of Indianapolis, IN. (I'll start in the end of January.)

I got the call. The vote was 100%, the retiring pastor said. People who'd never seen me before voted for me to be their pastor.

I thanked Pastor Smith and hung up the phone. I gave Kristy the news, and she responded with a joyful attempt at something resembling a fist pump.

I, on the other hand, just sat there. For an hour and a half, I let it soak in.

Several other emotions/thoughts managed to get in on the soaking, as well.

Time to put your money where your mouth has been.

After waiting seven months, I think I feel more relieved than anything else.

Wow...I'm a pastor now. It's not a dream. There's a place, and some people, and a building, and everything!

- - -

So I'm snooping around the Brand Autopsy blog, and I watch the video sample of the presentation that Brand Autopsy dude gets paid to give. And at the end, he says something that hits me like a ton of bricks.

"The only reason to take on a new product, or business, is to change the world. Nothing else is worth the effort."

And it reminded me of where the apostles were accused of turning the world upside down. And it made me really intense about something:

I can't measure success purely by having 50, or 100, or any other number in attendance. Not by addition or mulitiplication of programs, either.

I desire nothing less than to bring the Kingdom of God to Oaklandon, Indianapolis, and the world.

And now - God's giving me the chance.

One Man's Take on Blogging

"When I see news stories about people all over the world who are experiencing hardships, I worry about them, and I rack my brain wondering how I can make a difference. So I decided to start my own blog. That way I won’t have time to think about other people.

"People who are trying to decide whether to create a blog or not go through a thought process much like this:

1. The world sure needs more of ME.
2. Maybe I’ll shout more often so that people nearby can experience the joy of knowing my thoughts.
3. No, wait, shouting looks too crazy.
4. I know – I’ll write down my daily thoughts and badger people to read them.
5. If only there was a description for this process that doesn’t involve the words egomaniac or unnecessary.
6. What? It’s called a blog? I’m there!

"The blogger’s philosophy goes something like this:

Everything that I think about is more fascinating than the crap in your head.

"The beauty of blogging, as compared to writing a book, is that no editor will be interfering with my random spelling and grammar, my complete disregard for the facts, and my wandering sentences that seem to go on and on and never end so that you feel like you need to take a breath and clear your head before you can even consider making it to the end of the sentence that probably didn’t need to be written anyhoo."

- Scott Adams, in his Dilbert newsletter

You can find the Dilbert Blog here.